People are stupid stupid animals
I have no major problems with my job if I am allowed to ignore the customers' (and sometimes other associates') incessant stupidity and ignorance, one of my pet-peeves. Oh let me tell you, there is high quality intelligence at your Moore Wal-mart Supercenter. It's usually pretty easy to get past it when I'm working a regular register. In fact, I've gone whole days without having the urge to slap some lady with an open hand. (seriously, how many times have I got to tell someone to flip there card over and slide it black-bar down before they get it right?)
Well, today I had the pleasure of working self-checkout. H-o-l-y shit, rocket scientists everywhere. There is a fucking Skip-bagging button that appears Every GD time you scan an item. You don't have to try to fit your fucking swimming pool into the "bagging area". Look around for once you ego centric, I-want-to-hurry-up-and-get-the-fuck-outa-here, prick. And when I walk up to the moron (or Mooron[?]) and politely point it out to them, they look at me like I just showed them the holy fucking grail that's been sitting on the bill of their hat and they say every time, without fail, "Oh, I didn't see that before." I'm going to make a gigantic flame-pink sign and hang it up above the self-checkouts that reads, "If needed, push the skip-bagging button, you stupid, red-neck, bastard."
That's not all. I mean come on, with a little practice, you've got to be a complete idiot to not be able to work with this technology. I guess that's just about every body who's too stuck up to let a trained professional scan their purchases. The whole damn system is based on weight, that's force for you laymen (the effect that gravity has on your mass). If you scan an item then the computer expects one of two things to happen: One, you put your package of cherry flavored back-door condoms in the freakin' bag, or, you press the skip bagging button. Simple shit. But what does every paint-sniffer do after they scan something? They pick-up the fucking bag and try to put their shit in a different one! What the fuck?! Of course you're gonna have a God Damn weight error! You retard! Not only do they do this until I tell them what they're doing wrong, but they do it again! And then they get mad at me for they're incompetence. And they get mad because they think the thing is fucking-up. That's such bullshit. From beginning to end, it tells you, like you are a retarded child, exactly what to do. Then we have the idiots who think that picking up anything from the bagging area will get you a weight error and they try to pile all their shit like a freakin' pyramid there.
If these people weren't so fucking impatient and unable to listen to simple instructions, they'd be out so much sooner.
Oh yeah, and "please select your payment type" doesn't mean, "please try to shove as much money into the dollar slot as possible," or, "please try put your written check into the change receptacle." It means, push one the giant fucking buttons on the touch screen that's marked in your particular flavor of money, you dumb-ass. It makes me angry just thinking about it. There is so much more, I can't even talk about it anymore.
Fate is working against me. Ever since I decided that I had the courage ask this girl out our schedules have not overlapped in a way for me to have the chance. The only time I've seen her in the last few days is out on the floor while we're madly checking people out. Not exactly the best time for such a conversation. Plus, she's off tomorrow and I'm not, then, I'm off on Friday but she isn't. That leaves Saturday and Sunday. I'm working on it.
Please, pardon all the 'fucking's.
P.S. About all these movie reviews you guys do, I'm going to stop reading them. I don't like movie reviews, I don't usually care much if other people like movies. A two or three line reaction would be acceptible. But this multiple paragraph breakdown of actors performances and the quality of the sound and light shit makes me feel like I'm reading the newspaper. I usually skim the newspaper. I do care if my friends like movies, but I like to talk about them face to face, like right after I watch it or something. I'm not dogging on your blogs or anything. I have no right to do that. It's your blog and you have the right to talk about whatever you want. Shit, I know I post some weird shit that not everybody's interested in. Just saying, that's why I don't do reviews. Other than that, I love your blogs. I'm glad it grew on everyone. I don't think I could get through the day anymore without reading them. they make me laugh and make me cry. Keep up the good work folks.
Well, today I had the pleasure of working self-checkout. H-o-l-y shit, rocket scientists everywhere. There is a fucking Skip-bagging button that appears Every GD time you scan an item. You don't have to try to fit your fucking swimming pool into the "bagging area". Look around for once you ego centric, I-want-to-hurry-up-and-get-the-fuck-outa-here, prick. And when I walk up to the moron (or Mooron[?]) and politely point it out to them, they look at me like I just showed them the holy fucking grail that's been sitting on the bill of their hat and they say every time, without fail, "Oh, I didn't see that before." I'm going to make a gigantic flame-pink sign and hang it up above the self-checkouts that reads, "If needed, push the skip-bagging button, you stupid, red-neck, bastard."
That's not all. I mean come on, with a little practice, you've got to be a complete idiot to not be able to work with this technology. I guess that's just about every body who's too stuck up to let a trained professional scan their purchases. The whole damn system is based on weight, that's force for you laymen (the effect that gravity has on your mass). If you scan an item then the computer expects one of two things to happen: One, you put your package of cherry flavored back-door condoms in the freakin' bag, or, you press the skip bagging button. Simple shit. But what does every paint-sniffer do after they scan something? They pick-up the fucking bag and try to put their shit in a different one! What the fuck?! Of course you're gonna have a God Damn weight error! You retard! Not only do they do this until I tell them what they're doing wrong, but they do it again! And then they get mad at me for they're incompetence. And they get mad because they think the thing is fucking-up. That's such bullshit. From beginning to end, it tells you, like you are a retarded child, exactly what to do. Then we have the idiots who think that picking up anything from the bagging area will get you a weight error and they try to pile all their shit like a freakin' pyramid there.
If these people weren't so fucking impatient and unable to listen to simple instructions, they'd be out so much sooner.
Oh yeah, and "please select your payment type" doesn't mean, "please try to shove as much money into the dollar slot as possible," or, "please try put your written check into the change receptacle." It means, push one the giant fucking buttons on the touch screen that's marked in your particular flavor of money, you dumb-ass. It makes me angry just thinking about it. There is so much more, I can't even talk about it anymore.
Fate is working against me. Ever since I decided that I had the courage ask this girl out our schedules have not overlapped in a way for me to have the chance. The only time I've seen her in the last few days is out on the floor while we're madly checking people out. Not exactly the best time for such a conversation. Plus, she's off tomorrow and I'm not, then, I'm off on Friday but she isn't. That leaves Saturday and Sunday. I'm working on it.
Please, pardon all the 'fucking's.
P.S. About all these movie reviews you guys do, I'm going to stop reading them. I don't like movie reviews, I don't usually care much if other people like movies. A two or three line reaction would be acceptible. But this multiple paragraph breakdown of actors performances and the quality of the sound and light shit makes me feel like I'm reading the newspaper. I usually skim the newspaper. I do care if my friends like movies, but I like to talk about them face to face, like right after I watch it or something. I'm not dogging on your blogs or anything. I have no right to do that. It's your blog and you have the right to talk about whatever you want. Shit, I know I post some weird shit that not everybody's interested in. Just saying, that's why I don't do reviews. Other than that, I love your blogs. I'm glad it grew on everyone. I don't think I could get through the day anymore without reading them. they make me laugh and make me cry. Keep up the good work folks.
posted by Unknown | 1:05 AM
4 Comments:
I can identify with your problems with customers. I can't be so angry because I work at a specialty retail store and most people don't know a lot about video games. I think what annoys me is when I tell someone something, like my opinion, and they don't take it. Why the hell did you ask me then?
And now he censors himself? Where's the real Sean indeed?
Sean, didn't you used to be somewhat of a laid back sorta guy? Maybe you just save all of it for the internet. I almost wanna call you just as stupid as your customers for not realizing people are that stupid before you began your job. Take a few days off, man. A chill pill is in order. In other news, I farted.
It's just a rant people, take it easy. This is how I stay a laid back guy. Gotta releave the preasure somehow.
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